I felt totally weak, once again. I tried my best to avoid the pain, avoid from telling you, avoid anything that makes me feel the pain or feeling sad. But, it was a failure. I'm confuse on what should I do next. If the experts can't help me, how am I gonna help myself? And what can I do when the experts are not serious? I may be smiling, laughing and cracking jokes all the time but no one knows how much pain I'm feeling inside. Sometimes, I felt that my life is nothing but you, never fail to brighten up my bad days. And, it's always because of you, I'm strong enough to move on. Moving on with my current status might not be a problem. But, how am I gonna live, happily, with an unknown specific status? I felt security in my life. If life is a burden to me, why continue living?
I want my life back. I want those time when I can do anything I want. I'm in pain.